Basic Chocolate Cake

Today, an easy recipe to trash your kitchen: my chocolate cake (This is what I like to call my American-style recipe, although it’s not typically American. I’ll soon share my French chocolate cake recipe, the Reine de Saba).

You will need, by order of appearance:

• 1 stick softened butter (I leave mine outside the fridge the evening prior)
• 3/4 cup granulated or bakers sugar
• 3 eggs (I always see recipes recommending “large” eggs. I use normal, free-run ones. THINK OF THE HENS)
• 8 oz semi-sweet chocolate (I use Baker’s. They didn’t pay me to write this)
• 2 table spoons water
• 1 tablespoon vanilla extract (I prefer pure to artificial, but I’m well aware it costs more than unicorn tears)
• 1 cup sifted flour
• 1 tablespoon baking powder
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• Something to grease your pan (Somehow, that sounds… sexual)

But also:

• A whisk
• A spatula (okay, I use two)
• A large bowl (Remember to rinse it well while your kid’s goldfish slowly suffocates in the trash, your monster)
• A bowl or pan to melt your chocolate
• A round 8 to 9 inch pan (mine’s 8″5, gentlemen, also it’s a non-stick with a string clasp, for easy unmolding)
• An oven
• Love

So, without further ado…

1. Pre-heat your oven to 350 degrees (180°C)
2. In the fishbowl, whisk together the sugar and butter into a smooth paste.
3. Incorporate the 3 eggs, whisk like a mo-fo until you get a pale yellow cream.
4. Melt the chocolate with 2 tablespoons of water. If you’re doing this in a pan, stir continuously so it doesn’t stick to the bottom. You should obtain a shiny, creamy consistency.
5. Incorporate the chocolate to the batter with a spatula, and whisk until everything is smoothly blended.
6. Add your teaspoon of vanilla extract, whisk again.
7. Using a sifter, incorporate 1/2 cup flour, mix and repeat. It’s best not to dump all your flour at once like a savage beast, otherwise you’ll get lumps. What I do is that I hold the sifter with my left hand above the fishbowl, pour the flour with my right hand, and then I shake the sifter while mixing the flour together with the batter.
8. Do the exact same thing to add the baking powder.
9. And baking soda.
10. By now, your batter should have the exact color and consistency of Nutella (See pic on the right).
11. Grease your pan (God that sounds so filthy!)
12. Bake for 40mn.
13. Stab the cake with a toothpick to check if it’s done. If the toothpick comes out clean and dry, you win.
14. Let the cake sit until it’s fully cooled, and run a PLASTIC knife along the cake’s edge to unmold it. (No metal, unless you want to ruin your non-stick pan)

Et voilà! This is a good base for pretty much any cake: it holds together well, and it’s easy to unmold and cut, so you can even it, slice it horitonzally and add layers of frosting, ganache, cream (and cherries… because Forêt noire is my favorite cake!) Or you can eat it just as it is.