Rapey Thundercats

I bought this particular book for all the wrong reasons and plead guilty: I wanted to read something awful to relax a bit, so I scoured Amazon for oiled bodybuilder chest covers (usually the promise of a subtle plot).

Soon enough, I was looking at a bunch of chest covers for a series whose premise was basically: “THUNDERCATS AND SEX!”

I clicked on the cheapest, and some furry “non-raped” the heroine in the first five pages. By non-rape, I mean that under any other circumstances, attacking and terrorizing a woman, kidnapping her in the woods, locking her in your bedroom and stripping with claims that she’s going to enjoy it so much she’ll want more would qualify as rape, but the heroine finds the Thundercat super hot, allowing for a modicum of dubious consent.

I think that the moment where she starts mellowing ever so slightly and he resorts to begging her to let him bang her was the worst. In this whole scene, you have a perfect example of a sociopath’s behavioral pattern: from aggression, negotiation to manipulation and begging.

After they’re done, the Thundercat establishes that this bout of rapey sex binds them forever: she’s his mate, and she’ll never be allowed to leave his house again. Other Thundercats are hot on their trail though, intent on freeing the heroine because, hey, kidnapping is bad.
The heroine eventually escapes (she feels sad and guilty about it, though, because she liked him already and the sex had been awesome).

Then her love interest snarls and mulls over their separation for about 100 pages, and at some point the heroine is kidnapped again, by evil scientists and douchey anti-Thundercats activists, this time.
She’s locked in a super secret secret military facility with another Thundercat whom the evil scientists are experimenting on. They spend millions of dollars to build convoluted plot devices that will force their prisoners to have sex on camera for them to watch (I want their job. It doesn’t seem too technical, and definitively entertaining).

Our rapey hero eventually barges in to free the heroine and it all ends with a 24 hours express wedding.

Thundercat – ME WANTS WEDDING.
Heroine – We’ve only known each other for a few days, I’m not sure …
Thundercat – MINE!!!
Other, more articulate Thundercat with matrimonial power – I can marry you tomorrow!
Thundercat – RAWR!

Also, honestly, that part where the hero jumps the heroine’s bones right after she got nearly raped and received medical treatment for being badly beaten by a bunch a villains … It was well handled, I didn’t cringe as much as I could have.

All in all, what I mean to say is that is was awesome. Just looking back on it, I’m still grinning.